Alone but Strong

Single mother of two beautiful girls trying to rebuild my life. One day at a time.

Ego Booster

This past weekend, in the middle of all the drama, I said to myself, what am I waiting for, let’s put this fish in some water. So I signed up for a dating site. And all I have to say is, what was I afraid of? I really have no good answer to that, but what I do know is, I am having a blast. I know, I know, I should control my ego instead of trying to boost it, but after the past 2 years, I’m sorry my ego needs a boost, it really, really does.

As a 38 year-old woman who hasn’t dated in 18 years and who’s ex husband never complimented her, at least not in the last 16 years, I really needed to hear that I’m beautiful.

So let me tell you about a few of them.
There was one 22 year-old who, when I said he was too young, said “Actually I am 32 I made a mistake when I created my profile and havent been able to fix it… Hope that changes your mind?” You know he’s lying through his teeth, but it sure made me smile.

Or the 32 year-old from NYC who started the conversation with: “I’m jealous, is that bad?” I just had to ask why. And he answered: “Because of our distance and I don’t fit your age specs and someone will enjoy you instead of me…is that bad?” A little too slimy for me, but still nice to hear.

I’ve been e-mailing back and forth with a 41 year-old man who lives fairly close, he seems really nice, not the type I would normally go for but I am keeping an open mind. And to be honest I don’t even know if I have a type anymore. I’ve agreed to meet him for coffee today at 3PM. I’ve got a girlfriend who knows all the details, I even sent her a screen shot of his picture… You can never be too careful.



  1. AT 3 P.M. I will be sending little prayers, wishes and blessings to just relax and enjoy your time. A good male friend is what I made of two of my matches last year! I can go to sports stuff with one, a movie or on a walk with another. Neither has sparks on my side of the equation! But I had some sparks with two men last year of all the 100 I dated and blogged about a lot of first dates!! Only one of the men with a spark did I go on more than 3 dates, things changed after we started kissing more than once. I was not in that big of a hurry, he discarded me! The other ended up having an ex-girlfriend who he was still “friendly” that took a lot of my energy up worrying if he would go back… You will be extra cautious and daylight is excellent time to meet. Public places, having someone call and check in if it is evening worked out well for me on more than one occasion, saying I had to go. Better to bail early by using an emergency than muddle along!

    • That’s sort of what I figured, I’ll give (almost) anyone a chance. Because you’re right, there has to be a spark! If there is no spark, then I really hope I can get some new friends out of this. I’m hoping that I have the courage to come right out and say it.

      I’m so sorry that the guy dropped you instead of giving you the time you needed.

  2. Yes, sadly I allowed him to call once in awhile, and stupidly, my heart would lift and hope would rise. I have just this month (a year from our first date) told him not to call and I blocked his number. It was silly to keep hoping and “false hope” becomes a life of its own. Fantasies of ‘he’ll miss me, when he leaves this one…’ Oh well! Everyone is trying, even my Mom, to get me back on a different dating site.

  3. Good luck with your new adventures. I will be thinking of you.

  4. Hi, have we got any impending updates on your 3:00 p.m. coffee date? Hope it went well, take it easy, girlfriend!

    • It was really nice. No earth shattering sparks, but some butterflies. I’ll take it. Made a dinner date for tonight ๐Ÿ™‚

  5. Be very careful. Keep us updated , I love the 22 year old that is now 32… if he is 32 and can not figure out how to change something so simple he is probably not the sharpest tool in the shed.

    • Either way, 22 or 32, he’s not for me ๐Ÿ™‚ My dinner date went really, really good… More to follow!

  6. Thank you for stopping by my posts and liking them, very nice, Maria. Also, I will cross my fingers for the dinner date! Take care, Robin

    • Dinner date was very successful! I’ll write for about it when I’m not so jet lagged…

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